The Empty-Chair Technique (or Much to Stress About Nothing?)

empty-chair technique n. In Gestalt therapy, a technique in which the client switches between two chairs, acting out both sides of a conversation or argument with a spouse, relative, or other significant person. Also called chairwork.

I'm stressing. And I have a feeling it's about stupid stuff. So I'm going to attempt to reassure myself by employing the use of the empty-chair technique (with proper lumbar support, because man does my back hurt all the time). Plus, by even doing this I feel like my hard-earned Master's degree is not going to waste while it sits on a shelf idle during the current chapter of my life.

1. I have missed 2 weeks in a row of Music Together. Both because of sleepless nights. It just didn't make sense to make Sophie wake up after finally falling asleep in order to attend an "extra-curricular" activity. Shortly after this unit started we had to switch locations due to our schedule change at school. So instead of having a 5 minute drive, we now have a 25 minute drive. Meaning we spend as much time in the car as we do in the class. So let's just stop going altogether. Well I paid something like $150 for the session, so it seems like we need to get our money's worth. We can make up the missed classes, but we are busy almost every other day of the week. I guess we'll find a couple of weeks that we can double up and attend 2 classes. And if not, it's just money I guess. This will be our last session of Music Together. I'm going to stop stressing about it.

2. We should be on our way to school right now, but instead Sophie is feeding herself a bowl of cereal and milk and I am writing this post. Hey, at least she is feeding herself. Her self-feeding skills have really improved. Cereal and milk is probably one of the hardest things to self-feed. She had a rough night again (I'll get to why in a minute) and she felt feverish when she woke up. So I decided not to send her to school. If she seems better later, we'll go out and run some errands. Here's the annoying part- she has not been to school by herself all 3 days of any week since she started school. I don't mind her being home or tagging along on my errands, but I am now paying tuition at one of the most expensive schools here for her to stay home 25% of the time. Again, I guess it's just money. And she's only 2. And she will get through the rough nights and the colds and be in school consistently soon. I'm going to stop stressing about it.

3. I need a new camera. Ours broke almost as soon as we got to Las Vegas. I had wanted to replace ours anyways, it was way behind in technological advances. Well, now I am in dire need of one. I have already missed important photo ops. And we NEED one before the baby comes. I am trying to do all of the research, but I just don't know what to do. I really don't want to buy another "point and shoot," even though they are cheap and have come a long ways since we bought our old one. The SLR's are awesome, but pricey. Should I compromise and buy an older model SLR? Will I regret that as I learn more about photography? Should I just fork out the $1300 for the camera I really want? Is that an absurd amount of money to pay for a camera? I think in this case I need to just make a definite decision. I'll give myself the deadline of the end of this week. I'm going to research a bit more and then just buy one. I guess I'll just take comfort in knowing that a decision will be made and a camera will be bought in a few days.

4. There's not enough time to do ANYTHING. Sophie has been missing school, or I've had to hang out there with her, or school has been closed (who takes a 4 day weekend for President's Day?) so much that I really haven't had the 3 mornings a week that I thought I would have. I used to have 2-3 hours in the afternoon while Sophie napped, but for the past week and a half I've been napping with her to help her adjust to her new bed. I do feel better when I nap, but I'm not getting anything done! And some things are actually important, considering in another couple of weeks I won't have time for ANYTHING. I used to be able to clock out for the day around 8:30pm, have some time to get some things done, or at least unwind, before getting a couple decent chunks of sleep. For the past week and a half Sophie has been up at night and the more-than-"normal" sleep deprivation is killing me. It was so bad 2 nights ago that we just decided to start putting her to bed in her new room last night. It went okay. I stayed in there for an hour, then left to take a shower. When I got out, Shimmy was in there with her. He said she kept coming out, so he just took her hand and brought her back in. He ended up sleeping in there with her all night. I could hear them every hour on the monitor. Will we ever all sleep normally again? At least she slept in her bed all night. We had to start some time. Hopefully it will get easier each time and in a few days she'll be totally adjusted. I think I just need to resign myself to the fact that my sleeplessness started a month before the baby came instead of continuing to wish I could get more sleep now.

5. I was invited to a mom's night out tomorrow night, which I would love to go. But that means coming home after stroller shopping in Gaithersburg instead of going to my parents for dinner. Assuming Shimmy will even be home in time so that I can go. If we stay at my parents house, will Sophie take a nap? Do I have to lay with her in a bed there or can I put her in the crib? If we come back home afterwards, will we have missed her nap window? Will my dad be very disappointed that he didn't get to see Sophie? Do I even want to have to get dressed and go somewhere at 7:30 at night? I think I can totally play this one by ear. I will feel accomplished just getting to that store and choosing a stroller. Whatever happens after that doesn't really matter. I don't need to decide now, and I don't need to feel guilty about whatever decision I do end up making.

There are probably more things I am stressing about, but this has already taken an hour and a half. I think I do feel a little better about some things, though.