Guilty, but Productive

I did something today I never thought I'd do. And never did with Sophie. I began Day One of what will hopefully be a long term arrangement of a babysitter for Lilah two mornings a week for 2-3 hours. To me, being a stay at home mom means just that. It means I have consciously decided to do nothing but stay at home with my kids (while they are home, meaning before they begin attending school). It is quite the sacrifice. It has become too much of a sacrifice lately. Lilah has turned into a busy baby. Our house is the great uncharted Western territories and she is Lewis and/or Clark. And if you've ever been to my house you understand that this is only a slight exaggeration. Every electrical outlet, plant, food item in the pantry, door stop, magnet, etc. must be inspected, tasted, and partially broken. In short, she needs constant supervision. And in order for me to provide it, I cannot do anything else including using the bathroom. I began slacking off in all areas- cooking, cleaning, exercising, and yard work. Not to mention things I actually enjoy like conversing with other adults. So I made the plunge. I found a nice, responsible 18 year old with a wonderful personality and her own car. And this morning went off without a hitch. Lilah had someone to play with her and give her undivided attention for nearly three solid hours. And I accomplished the equivalent of what I accomplished during the entirety of last week. I do feel a little guilty. Actually, a lot guilty. When the babysitter said to me, "she is SUCH an easy baby" (because she has such a sweet, easy-going personality and IS easy when you are watching her like a hawk) I sort of stammered some lame excuse about why I needed a babysitter. I never would have thought I would have hired one. And it would never have worked with Sophie- she wasn't as exploratory as Lilah is, and she also was not as easy-going. If someone needed to be giving her undivided attention, that someone needed to be me, which she made quite clear. Lilah could not care less who is playing with her, as long as someone is playing with her. Hiring a babysitter seems to have been the right decision for us at this time and that's what matters. That's all that ever matters, really. That's what I have learned most about parenting, and is, in fact the "advice" I give new and future parents who ask for it. What works for one parent and child is not necessarily what will work for you. You have to trust your instincts and find your groove, even when it means second-guessing what you thought you believed at a different time in your life. When it comes down to it, it's all about survival. And right now, this babysitting arrangement is helping us survive a little better than before.

A Day in the Life

I really don't have time to be blogging right now, but I need a break from my day. And blogging always feels like I am accomplishing something as opposed to doing nothing on said "break." Come to think of it, I may have used this title before, but it still fits, and, unfortunately, the Beatles aren't exactly coming up with new material :( Which reminds me! I am going to see Sir Paul McCartney live in concert! I impulsively booked a ticket! It is July 28! In Charlotte! And, no, I do not live anywhere near Charlotte. But Charleston is sort of near Charlotte and I need to make it down there at some point this summer to visit the relatives, so I booked a ticket! And a friend from way back when who I keep in touch with on facebook is also going! So we are having a girls road trip/night out with Sir Paul! Yay!

Anyhoo, A Day in the Life. Specifically my life. Specifically today. The last words I said before turning out the light last night were- and I am totally serious- "Please, God, let me get a lot of sleep tonight." To which God replied, "HAHAHAHAHA! No way, sucker!" Because not 30 minutes after falling asleep, Sophie woke me up for the first of what would be four times over the course of the night. Two of those times were to use the bathroom post her Chinese food dinner (enough said). So it didn't come to that much of a shock to me this morning when she insisted that she did not want to go to school because her stomach still hurt and she was tired. I told her she could stay home, even though my brain screamed, "NO! I HAVE TO GO TO THE GROCERY STORE AND I HATE TAKING BOTH KIDS! AND WE ARE HAVING COMPANY FOR DIINER THAT I NEED TO COOK AND CLEAN FOR!" Shimmy, who usually drives Sophie to school before going to work, decided to go ahead and leave so he could get to work early. As soon as Sophie finished breakfast she exclaimed, "My tummy is all better! Now I can go to school!" This was about 10 minutes after school had started. I made a quick decision to put the rest of my coffee in the frig and get the three of us dressed and out of the house as quickly as possible. I dropped Sophie off about a half an hour late, and then Lilah and I headed to the grocery store. We came home, put the groceries away and I whipped up two awesome desserts for tonight that needed to freeze for the rest of the day. Meanwhile, I paused every two minutes to pull Lilah off of the oven, which clearly looks more like a ladder to her. She also needed to be pulled off of the dishwasher several times. When things got quiet I soon realized she was halfway up the stairs, which she still occasionally falls down. I decided to put her in her high chair and give her an early lunch while I cleaned the kitchen. During my cleaning I realized that I need to get Sophie's teacher's end of the year gifts. At some point I turned around and saw Lilah standing up, facing backwards, trying to climb and jump out of the high chair. Time to start strapping her in. As soon as I was finished cleaning up it was time to go get Sophie. I ate a quick lunch first- the rest of Lilah's macaroni off of her high chair tray. I ate it with the fork Sophie had used for breakfast. After I picked Sophie up we went shopping for teachers' gifts. Then we came home, everyone had a quick snack, and Lilah went down for a nap. Lilah is now sleeping. Sophie is having quiet time with a show. I just came back inside from trying out several different old hoses in an attempt to fill our pool quicker. Now I'm here. Damn, I think it's time to get back to work. Company will be here in two hours...

Conversations with Sophie and Lilah

Interesting things Sophie has said recently:
To a friend: "Can you share with Lilah? She's a nice girl."
To me: "When I'm a grown up i'm going to have those chips, beer, and Texas Pete."
To me: "When I grow up I'm going to live in the little house [old house] again."

Lilah can't have "conversations," per se, yet, but she did say two new words for the first time yesterday:

Chicken
and
Sophie

It was very exciting!

After which, Sophie said to Lilah: "Oh! Thank you for saying 'Sophie!' You're a good girl! I love you!"