24

I have never seen the show 24, but I have been told that each episode covers a 24 hour period, and I imagine that a lot happens over the course of each said 24 hour period. Here are my last 24 hours:

3:30 pm yesterday: Sophie had been home from school for only a few minutes (God bless the friend that brings her home every day. It is seriously my saving grace in life.) when Lilah woke up from her nap. I was not excited at the prospect of entertaining them for another four hours until bedtime, so I took them out shopping at a couple of nearby stores.

5:00pm: Things were going pretty well. I had found some shoes for myself, a birthday present for a kid's party we are going to this weekend, and each of the girls had chosen a book. Sophie was being a typical four year old in a store: dancing down the aisles, walking backwards, touching all of the clothes, etc., but generally behaving. Lilah was eating a snack of cheese crackers. She was asking to get out of the stroller a lot, but was also behaving fine. She had been coughing/congested all day and the school nurse had called me, but I hadn't been all that concerned. My kids have asthma; they cough a lot. Sometimes they wheeze and we use an inhaler. No biggie. All of a sudden Lilah's coughing turned into vomitting. All over herself, the stroller, and one of the not-yet-paid-for books she was holding at the time. And we were next in the check out line. Here is where my experience at these types of things came in handy. I calmly walked us all to the back of the store, toward the restroom, drawing as little attention as possible to ourselves (impressive feat considering we were a caravan of vomit). When we got to the restroom, the door was being blocked by a garment rack. I struggled to move the rack, open the door, and maneuver my nine month pregnant self, a fidgety four year old, and a stroller containing a crying, vomit-covered two-year-old through the narrow opening, all while a saleswoman looked on and made no attempt to help in any way. Once inside the small room, I got to work. Luckily, I carry an entire package of wipes in my purse at all times. I wiped down Lilah, the book, and the stroller pretty quickly. I got everything organized in the stroller's basket and started to open the door. The garment rack had been pushed back against the door again, so once again, I had to really struggle to get us all out. Again, the saleswoman was just standing there watching. When we were all settled on the other side of the door I thanked her for her help. She told me it wasn't her job to help me. I said a few more sarcastic things to her and walked away. We walked over to the kids' clearence clothes, picked up a cheap dress to change Lilah into, and made our way back to the check out line. When we were outside, I changed Lilah into the new dress, and back home we went. All in all, we did find a way to pass a couple of hours, so mission: accomplished.

6:00pm: We had breakfast for dinner followed by the kids playing outside while I potted some plants.

8:00pm: The kids had been bathed, changed into jammies, had watched their bedtime show, and went to bed pretty easily. Lilah was not breathing well, so we did the inhaler and I set up a mist humidifier in her room.

9:00pm: Shimmy came home and we had dinner and our daily debriefing session together. Then he went to work out and I went to do my hair for my maternity photo shoot that was to occur the next day.

10:00pm: Shimmy and I reconvened for the Roast of Charlie Sheen on Comedy Central. It was hilarious. I fell asleep before it was over, hoping to get a good night's sleep and be refreshed for my photo shoot.

10:48pm: Lilah woke up crying. Shimmy did the inhaler with her again and put her back to bed.

1:30am: Lilah woke up again. Shimmy laid down with her in her bed.

3:50am: Lilah came and got me. Shimmy was passed out in her bed. She climbed into bed with me. I gave her a snack and let her watch some tv, then we both went back to sleep.

7:46am: I heard Sophie in the bathroom calling out, "Daddy, help me!" Followed by, "Daddy, I'm starting to pee on the floor!" Followed by, "Daddy, I had an accident!" Daddy was still passed out in Lilah's room and deaf to the world around him. I stumbled into the bathroom through my sciatica and leg cramps, cleaned up the floor, and showered Sophie. Then I helped her get dressed and went downstairs with her to make breakfast and pack her lunch for school. The construction workers, who were already here, asked me many questions and had me move a car. Lilah made her way downstairs shortly thereafter in good spirits, but her breathing was very labored. Shimmy made his way downstairs shortly after that and decided that both he and Lilah should stay home today and that Lilah should be seen by a doctor. I decided to hell with everything, I would go about my own plans to make myself glamorous and enjoy my maternity photo shoot, which would now have to be indoors as it was raining.

8:30am: Shimmy took Sophie to school and Lilah entertained herself while I attempted to cover up my stress and lack of sleep with copious amounts of coffee and heavy doses of makeup.

9:30am: My photographer arrived and I had a GREAT session. Loved the photographer and can't wait to see the results!

10:30am: I went with Shimmy and Lilah to the doctor. I helped Shimmy hold Lilah down while she underwent a dreaded nebulizer treatment. We left with a better-breathing Lilah and some prescriptions. We went out for lunch, attempted to pick up the prescriptions (but they were still not ready), and went home.

2:15pm: After a lot of snacking, reading, stalling, and then rolling around and talking to herself, Lilah finally fell asleep.

2:40pm: I decided to go to sleep too.

3:13pm: Sophie woke me up, asked me for a snack, and told me, "Don't tell Daddy I woke you up."

Which brings us to the present, 3:30pm: Sophie is eating a snack and watching a show. Lilah is still napping. My parents will be here in a couple of hours to eat dinner and babysit while Shimmy and I are at Back to School Night. When I get back home I will have an exciting evening of four loads of laundry to fold.